


One Way or Another

by Aquaria



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Angry and obsessive Mickey, Angst, Bickering, Blackmail, Gallaghers Siblings protecting one another, Intimacy/ Coerced Intimacy, Kidnapping, M/M, Mafia/Mob, Minor Character Death, Non-Bipolar Ian Gallagher, Obsession, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Possessive Behavior, Pregnant Debbie, Sexual Tension, Violence/Murder
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-01
Updated: 2018-08-26
Packaged: 2019-05-31 20:57:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15127679
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aquaria/pseuds/Aquaria
Summary: “If you stay with me, I’ll take care of you and of your family. But if you refuse, I’ll make your lives a living hell.”Ian never left after Mickey's wedding but still broke up with him and refused to see him again.Years after, Ian takes care of a pregnant Debbie and work as an EMT. Mickey works for the Mob and has gained power but still can't get Ian out of his head. When he meet the redhead again, he only gets rejected harshly. Angry and deeply hurt, Mickey decides to use more drastic measure: threatening to go after Ian's family if he doesn't stay at his side. Ian has no choice but to accept the deal.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, I'm pretty hyped for that one! For those who missed it in the tags, Ian isn't bipolar (at least not yet).

Ian Gallagher…Even the name made him thirsty.

It sounded sweet and fiery at the same time and it sent nothing but sweet and fiery thrills in his body. _Little devil._ Ian Gallagher, tall and lean, the way he walked would be enough to entice him, sexy in a manly way, how he would turn his head back to look at him while walking away, telling him sexily to follow him in the backroom. _Little tempter_. The way he would lean down against a wall, titling his head slightly, nonchalantly, taking confidence when he could bask in his sensuality…

Little devil, little tempter, the fire of his hips…Ian…

Mickey Milkovitch opened his eyes, shaking out of his little semi-conscious reverie. It wasn’t unusual for him to think of Ian Gallagher. He shifted a bit and looked beside him. In the bed, a boy with slightly reddish blond hair was deeply asleep. Pale skin and nice face, nicely build, yet Mickey wanted him out of his bed. Not that the guy didn’t do good, in fact he was a tiger in bed, but he wasn’t what he truly wanted.

Ian…If all he felt was lust, it would have been simple, but no. Ian…so kind and feisty, a bit introvert at times but also confident; a bit clumsy too, except when he would fire with a gun or use this sensuality of his. Ian who could be as quiet as he could be sassy, Ian who knew himself and what he wanted. Ian who could be so serious and so danger-loving at the same time, Ian so sweet and alive…

He regretted what he did every single day. He hated himself for being so cowardish. That day when his dad walked on them and forced him to fuck Svetlana had been the worst of his life, because it made him lost Ian, his one true love. He couldn’t help but think of those words: _You love me, and you’re gay_. He had kicked Ian in the face, what a fucking moron he had been! He had played nice around Terry but beat up Ian who had given him much more than his damn father ever did! He often dreamed he had made the right choice: standing up to his father when it was the right moment and take Ian away with him. But it was too late.

“Hum…Can’t sleep.”

“Shut up,” Mickey growled at the guy. “ _I_ wanna sleep.”

The other did as he was told; He was obedient, too obedient. His Gallagher boy wouldn’t have obeyed so easily.

He sighed while closing his eyes. He should stop thinking about him, that story was over after all. He didn’t know who he should blame the most for that. He thought again of what happened, how Terry had him sleep with that whore while forcing Ian to watch…That was one of his most painful memories.

_You love me…And you’re gay._

That was the truth, the entire truth. Mickey had left him beaten on the ground after those words. It had been efficient; too efficient.

After the beating, Ian had avoided him entirely, walking away whenever he would try to talk to him in the streets or telling him to leave when he would go to Kash’n Grab. Ian told him it was over and those were the only words he addressed to him. Mickey had tried to tell him that in spite of the marriage, they could continue their relationship, but Ian had refused to talk to him. The atmosphere at home had become more and more suffocating. More than ever, he had felt the grim atmosphere, and seeing Ian around from time to time, unreachable but still so close…It had been like a torture.

So Mickey had involved himself with other people. Some guys who were a higher status of criminals, and he had started to work for them. He had done great; he had worked his ass off to be away from home, to forget Ian, to avoid his fucking father and his wife. The Mafia boss he worked for, Luc Batista, had noticed him and made him rise in society. He wasn’t on the right side of the fence, but it didn’t matter. Now, no one would bother him about his sexuality anymore, and people in the mob didn’t care that he liked guys. They were seeing and dealing with things far too twisted to be bothered by homosexuality. Some mobsters would despise him or taunt him, but Mickey had learned how to reply with time.

He heard distant cries. His kid was awake. He thought of going to him but Svetlana was already going. After the marriage, he had asked for a paternity test and it revealed he was indeed the kid’s father. Though he wasn’t really paternal, he found himself loving his kid. He genuinely loved Yevgeni and at times he felt like the child was his only reason to stay alive. Sometimes, Iggy’s presence was helping as well. Mandy was living in New York as an escort now, he hadn’t seen her since long and he didn’t want to mess her life, and Joey and their father, well…They would surely not bother him anymore. Iggy was now working under his orders and though he felt his brother loved him, he was also aware that he became the new family chief in Iggy’s eyes and therefore his brother would submit. He wasn’t sure how he felt about that.

He heard Svetlana talking softly to the baby. He still had no love for her, their relationship was cold, they were almost like workmates. He kept her around because he didn’t want to separate his son from his mother and because he had to admit she loved him and took care of him well. As a mother, Svetlana was indeed doing really well, she was way better than his own mom. That’s why he forbad himself to separate them, and he would try to treat her with respect…As long as she behaved, of course.

It was ironical when he thought about it: when he had Ian, he had been unable to build a life for them to enjoy. And after losing Ian, he did build a life in which he could have loved the red-head freely. But that was too late.  He got the life he wanted for them after losing him…It was as if fate or some shit like that had decided to mock him.

He eventually fell asleep. When he woke up, his current fuck buddy tried to make some small talk, but Mickey showed him he was in no mood for that kind of shit. He had work today. The young man left the house, not putting a fuss.

“Good morning,” Svetlana murmured while helping Yevgeni to eat.

“Good morning.”

That was all they said to each other and it was fine with him. He wished for something else, but she couldn’t give it. Mickey kissed the top of his son’s head before leaving. Today, he was in charge of the negotiations between his boss who lived in Detroit and mobsters of Chicago. For that, you needed a big mouth, presence, personality and to be level-headed. But more of all, you had to possess excellent reflexes. Mickey had all that, especially the reflexes, his abusive father and juvie taught him that. As for presence, hanging around men of a higher-class helped him improve that. He had always been good to impose himself, but now he also had elegance, class which called for respect.  

Today, a big cargo of weapons had to be delivered to Chicago from Detroit and Mickey would make sure that everything would go fine, and plan the next negotiations with the dealers in the name of his boss. What he liked was the conflict; it was a game of power and of wits. And with time, Mickey knew he had acquired both. In those moments, he felt alive, and he could forget the stupid, weak young man trembling before his father.

 

He followed the truck from Detroit and to Chicago to get to their client. He had to meet the man on the docks, and he smirked when he was back in the city he came from. The place where he grew up…His personal hell, where he once met heaven, only to lose it. He pushed those thought away as he saw the dealer and a few bodyguards with him. He also had men, not that he felt threatened, he could take those motherfuckers. Yet it would always make a better effect to have men with him, to remind them he wasn’t a little man coming alone, that he had backup and power.

“Lewis! Old man!” Mickey greeted while walking broadly toward the dealer he had to meet.

“You got my weapons, Milkovitch?”

“Always so grumpy! Got the money?”

“Of course we do.”

Mickey showed him the weapons they had to sell, and Lewis appeared to be satisfied.

“Good…Now, about the price…”

“I think we already settled that, Lewis.”

“What if I want us to discuss the price? Your guns are fine okay, but those aren’t worth that much.”

“Do I look like some fucking rug salesman? We settled the price, we keep it as such. Now, let me see the money, otherwise I leave with my weapons.”

Lewis snorted: “Don’t try to fuck with me…”

“No, you aren’t my type, be sure of that. Your little bodyguard here would be, though,” He purred while looked at a young man who seemed intimidated at that.

“You won’t leave, you need the money.”

“True, I need the money. I need and I _want_ the amount we negotiated. But you see, weapons can be sold easily, it wouldn’t be hard to find someone who want those and who won’t make me loose time. I didn’t know your boss was so short on money, by the way.”

This made Lewis tense a bit. “He isn’t. We simply don’t like to be screwed.”

“Once again, I swear you aren’t my type. You know how I see things?! Your boss can’t afford those weapons, even though we are selling those at a perfectly reasonable price. Which means that Diego, is starting to grow poorer. And we prefer rich clients. I’m pretty sure we can find plenty. Come on, guys!”

They turned round; just as he expected, Lewis called him back: “Milkovitch.”

“You can call me by my name, you know. Mickey. It’s not complicated.”

“Fuck off. Are you saying that Batista is turning his back on us?”

“Oh no, not at all. But business is business; we always understand when an old friend needs time to get back on his feet. If Diego can’t afford those weapons, fine, no problems, but I have to find something to do with those.”

Lewis snorted again: the message was clear. That was really something with him: “Okay, fine, Milkovitch. We’ll give you the amount you asked for. We wouldn’t want any hard feelings between us, would we?”

Mickey smiled widely. Once that was done, Mickey and Lewis spoke of the next delivery. This time, Lewis would be the salesman; a cargo of drug would await Mickey next time. This time, it was easier, maybe because Lewis didn’t want to vehicle the idea that his boss was lacking money or something like that. In the end Mickey left satisfied and reported what happened to his boss.

“Good job. I hate when those little dealers try to pick on the price,” his boss growled. “You’ll have to go back to Detroit soon, but you have another little job to do first, remember?”

“How could I forget? Everything is planned.”

“You’ll receive the money promptly. How is your boy by the way?”

“He is alright, sturdy already.”

That was something Batista would often do: ask for casual news like this. At first, Mickey thought it was a way to threaten the men to remind them they had children he could threaten. Yet with time, as he grew to know the man, he understood that it was actually politeness, meant to keep some kind of bond and show respect toward the ones who did well. Batista once told him something: power and authority also means showing some goodness and respect to those who does good for you. Otherwise no one will ever want to remain loyal to you. That was something Terry never understood. But now, that was maybe the reason why Batista was a big man, while Terry had been nothing but a low thug. Mickey promised himself he wouldn’t forget this lesson.

Once their conversation ended, he hung up his phone and called for his brother.

“Hey, Iggy,” he said in the phone. “Is everything ready?”

“It is, we only have to go there. Do we have to do this so late?”

“I don’t want anyone else to be hurt.”

“You’re the boss.”

Exactly, he was the boss…It sounded empowering but weirdly grim as well. Like a classy suit which had a stale smell on it.

 

Mickey felt almost impatient for what was about to come. He was several things in this mob, a negotiator/dealer, a bodyguard at times, a gunman and also a hitman. It was recent. One woman working for Batista had taken a liking on him when he started to work for their organization. She had taken him as some sort of apprentice and taught him some things about her job, more especially how to make a murder look like an accident. That was tricky, you had to be clever. And somehow, Mickey liked it. He had learned a lot with her, Leora her name was. She had made him work on his ingenuity, teaching him to think with a cold-head, think things through and resort to other means that straight-forward violence.

Today, he would put her lessons in good use. There was that man, Eddy, who owned a restaurant. That idiot had tried to steal drugs from their mob. Big mistake.

They went to his house at night and picked the lock of the back door. They entered the place and Mickey went to the kitchen. People were rarely careful enough with the gas these days.

They carefully closed the door behind them, leaving no trace of their passage. They remained hidden. They spoke a bit in the car, but when they fell silent; Mickey couldn’t help but think of Ian again. It often happened in those moments, when he had nothing to do but wait for something, or when he was in bed trying to sleep. At times, it felt like he was going for something unreachable. Yes, he had money, power, good stuff, a job he enjoyed, but he felt incredibly alone, empty, even.

An explosion was heard. It shook Mickey out of his thoughts. Maybe Eddy had awaken because the smell. But he made the error to turn on the lights. Mickey and Iggy Milkovitch both smirked in satisfaction.

The place started to burn, making people panic and come out of their house in the night. Of course, the firemen were called. Mickey arrived casually, and acted like everyone else when he was close enough to see, bewildered and concerned. In the middle of the crowd, no one would have noticed him, yet he would leave before the police arrived. The firemen did as well as they could, they got Eddy out but it was obvious there was no hope.

He watched as the EMT tried to reanimate the guy, but he was pretty sure it would be in vain. He was about to walk away, when something caught his eyes. Red hair…He looked and his eyes widened and his mouth slightly opened. He felt as if the world was swaying.

 

There, wearing an EMT uniform, Ian Gallagher himself was checking on the victim.

 

He stepped forward a bit. Did his eyes fool him? He couldn’t see that well, so maybe…The red head rose his head and told something to his colleague, and Mickey saw his face very clearly. Yes, it was him, no doubt about that. God…He remembered the boy, the teenager who could already make him quiver with a smile, but now Ian was a man. And he violently wanted to get that man. He watched as they left with the corpse, probably taking it to the hospital morgue. He was about to go to the red-head but controlled himself. He stayed here for too long already.

All those years, he hadn’t approached Ian, he hadn’t tried, maybe he was scared, maybe he didn’t want to face his old demons…But seeing him once again in the flesh, it had been like a jolt of life in a dead body.

He felt a hand on his shoulder and saw Iggy, who was frowning, silently reminding him they had to go. He followed his brother and they got into the car. Mickey owned a place there, which was useful when he had to stay in Chicago. It was in a classy neighborhood of the North Side. He knew Iggy liked it a lot, because there was a lot of good clubs around. His huge flat had a really good view on the buildings and he loved that.

“The night isn’t over yet,” Iggy pointed out. “Wanna go somewhere?”

“Go without me, I have some things think about.”

“As you wish!”

Iggy left him, completely oblivious to what his brother was going through. Mickey stared at the city below him. So vast…So entertaining and dangerous…And somewhere, Ian Gallagher was living. What was he doing right now? Did he saw Mickey? No, he was pretty sure he didn’t. Would the redhead think of him at times? How did he become an EMT? He wanted to be a soldier or some shit like that. What happened to Ian during this time? He had to see him again. Why not? He could collect info on Ian easily; he just had to send someone to find what he needed to know about his ex-lover.

_Ian Gallagher_ …


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Thanks to everyone who reviewed, it was really nice to read your comments! Here is the nex chapter, hope you'll like it!

Debbie’s voice was the first thing Ian heard that morning: “Rise and shine!”

He grunted slightly while being taken out of his slumber. He didn’t even want to open his eyes. “Let me sleep, Debs!”

“No way! You have to take your breakfast and do a jogging.”

He grumbled and eventually forced himself to open his eyes, and felt almost shocked by the sight of Debbie and her big belly. She would give birth in a month, and at times he still felt stunned at the idea that Debs would have a baby. He rubbed his eyes and yawned. Maybe he was still feeling a bit off, a man died last night, a gas explosion killed him, they hadn’t been able to save the poor fellow. But then, he had to get used to that sort of things.

“Come on, breakfast is ready,” Debbie informed him.

“Why do you have to wake me up every morning?”

“Because some time ago, someone asked me ‘ _Debbie, could you wake me up in the morning so I can keep up with my training routine?_ ’”

“Remind me to punch that dumbass.”

She giggled and left his room. He watched her with a little grin, she was doing fine. After her argument with Fiona, Debbie had refused to live in the Gallagher’s house anymore and Ian had told her to come and live with him. Though his flat wasn’t big, it was enough for two. It would be a bit tiny for three, but they would manage. They had already purchased a few things for the baby, and taken a lot of Liam’s old stuff as well.

She had prepared eggs and orange juice. Although he didn’t want her to get tired, she would always participate to the house life as much as she could. Maybe that was because she was feeling grateful toward him for giving him shelter without asking for much money.

“I’ll go see some friends today”, Debbie told him. “What are you gonna do?”

“Hang out with Caleb and Lip, and some other people tonight.”

“How is Lip?”

“Hum…It’s difficult for him to deal with everything that happened. But he’ll get back on his feet, I guess.”

Still, what an idiot! Lip had that girl, Amanda, who was nice with him, and obviously in love. And yet he cheated with some married gal.

“I hope so. He should have stayed with Mandy,” she murmured.

“Damn right…”

But he had cheated on Mandy with Karen…It seemed like Lip couldn’t help himself.

“Well, at least _you_ have someone now, and he’s cute.”

Ian grinned at the mention of Caleb, he knew Debbie liked him, his boyfriend had always been kind toward her. He finished his meal quickly and put on his sport clothes.

“Say ‘hi’ to Fiona,” Debbie said with some coldness.

“You’ll have to get along again, eventually,” he told her.

“One day, maybe.”

He shrugged and left. He wasn’t working today and it would be good to enjoy some times to relax. At least if he didn’t get an emergency call. He joined Fiona soon and they ran together through the streets.

“So, how is Debs doing?” Asked Fiona

“Pretty fine, her grades and pregnancy are both going well.”

“Good…I know I said I didn’t want to take care of another baby, but if you need help form time to time, don’t hesitate.”

“Okay, I’ll remember that!”

“…Did she spoke of me?”

“No, not really…She says ‘hi’. I can tell her you’ll help in case.”

Fiona grinned joylessly. She was still mad at Debbie for getting pregnant, but she missed her little sister nonetheless. And she felt guilty letting Ian handling things, her little brother managed to get a good, respectable life, she didn’t want him to ruin his life because of Debbie’s mistake. Yet Ian seemed happy for now.

“I hope she is alright…You know, Carl isn’t feeling well lately, he might have troubles.”

“What do you mean?”

“He told me he wanted to quit the game, something awful happened and he doesn’t want to continue. I was happy to hear that, but yesterday I saw him coming back home with a bad bruise on the face.”

This worried Ian. He had always feared that his little brother would do something wrong growing up, and recently, Carl had been involved in bad stuff. Hearing that he wanted to quit that world was good indeed, but it wouldn’t be easy at all. Sometimes it could be impossible.

“He didn’t tell you who did that?”

“No. I think he doesn’t want me to get involved. If you and Lip could talk to him, it could be good.”

“Okay. I’ll see Lip tonight, anyway, I’ll speak with him about it.”

He didn’t know if Lip and he could really help, but they could at least try.

That afternoon, he went out for some groceries, yet when he exited his building, he felt like he had been struck by lightning. A man wearing a suit was walking toward the door, _toward him_ , and his sight was almost unreal.

_Mickey Milkovich._

**O o O**

Sometimes, luck could be on his side. Mickey intended to get into the building and tap at the redhead’s door, but he didn’t even have to do that. Fiery hair blazing under the sun, Ian Gallagher stepped out. They found themselves facing each other, and Mickey couldn’t help but smile. Ian, however, looked stunned as hell, as if he was seeing a ghost. But after all, he was kind of a ghost for the Gallagher.

“Mickey?!”

“Hey…I was coming to see you; didn’t know you were about to leave.”

“Yeah…”

Gosh, he was still so attractive! He grinned again: “It had been a while.”

The redhead looked at him with confusion and even wariness, not really what he hoped for.

“Indeed.”

“So, you live here? Looks like a good place.”

Ian frowned and sighed: “What are you doing here?”

“I’m working. I’m living between Chicago and Detroit now. I’m here for a few days and…I saw you yesterday. Didn’t know you were an EMT.”

“Probably because we haven’t spoken since a long time,” Ian replied a bit harshly. “Did you really come here to speak about my job?”

The icy countenance form the redhead was almost making him shiver. Uneasiness spread through him at the sight of that composed man who looked at him as if he was some kind of unwanted stranger. The man took a deep breath:

“I wanted to see you again. You know, to speak a bit”

“Well, we just did. If you don’t have anything else to tell me, I’m busy.”

He made a move to leave but Mickey stepped before him. “Come on, don’t give me that shit, you know what I mean.”

“Enlighten me: say it out loud.”

His voice was cold and distant; he was angry at him…After all those years, Ian was still mad at him…He kinda expected that, but he still hurt a lot. It made the self-hatred and guilt even more intense than usual; Mickey didn’t think it could be possible to despise himself more than that, but obviously he had been wrong! He looked at him, he was still so tall, lean but not lanky. But his eyes…Those which used to be soft when he looked at him were now cold and hard like steel. This couldn’t be, he had to change that!

“Look…I know I screwed up in the past. But things are different now, except that I still think of you. And I…I thought maybe we could try to give ourselves a second chance.”

Ian stared at him intensely. When he finally spoke, it was in a measured, level-headed tone: “No. This is not happening.”

Being gutted would have probably been less painful. No…It wasn’t so much the word, but Ian’s tone. He wasn’t hesitant or anything, he sounded determined, absolutely sure of himself. Although he did his best not to show it, he was starting to feel like he was being stepped over.

“Dude, listen, I know…”

“No, you listen! Things have changed indeed, Mickey. I have a life now; I’m not the same person anymore, and guess what? I have a boyfriend.”

This felt like a punch in the chest. A boyfriend? He didn’t expect Ian to stay chaste during two years, but the word ‘boyfriend’ hinted something more serious, more important than simple one-night stands or fuck-buddies like the ones he had piled. Ian was in love with someone else? That couldn’t be!

“Say ‘hello’ to your wife. I have a busy day.”

With that, Ian left him and went away, not even turning back when Mickey tried to call him. The mobster didn’t know what was worse: the rejection, the sadness, the humiliation, the jealousy or the self-hatred. He felt like his heart was going to burst! He left the place, he had the impression that everyone was looking at him, stripping him of everything he acquired to reduce him again to the boy who trembled before his father. He left, furious and heartbroken.

He called the guy he hired to find information about Ian and told him to continue his work. He didn’t know what he wanted to find, but he wouldn’t give up!

**O o O**

Some hours later, the employee charged to find information about the redhead send a text telling him he saw him enter in a club. Mickey read the address and smirked slightly. The club Ian went in belonged to another mafia don, Sergeï Boyevick, with whom Mickey’s boss was associated. He could go there for a friendly visit; after all they would do that at times. It would allow him to strengthen some business ties while watching Ian a bit.

He suggested Iggy to come with him. His brother knew Mickey wanted to reconnect with his ex, and he was a bit afraid. He knew Mickey could do reckless things at times; he would go with him and be there just in case. Anyway it wasn’t as if he had planned to stay home tonight! They had already been in that club and it was a good one. Mickey knew he had to stay level-headed, so he went to the owner first. Sergeï wasn’t taking care of the club himself, instead it was a guy named Sam who did. He was sitting at table with some business partner when Mickey came toward him.

“Mickey! Iggy! It had been awhile!”

“Hey, Sam!”

“It’s good to see you,” Iggy claimed.

They spoke together for some times, Mickey bore it though he was impatient to search for Ian. He took looks at the room but didn’t see him. Eventually, Iggy went to pick up on girls. Mickey looked at the room and finally spotted red hair. His stomach churned and he tensed a bit.

He saw Ian, wearing a dress shirt and blue jeans…His clothes weren’t the finest quality, far from it, but Ian didn’t need that to look better than any other guy around. He was with some other people, guys and girls, probably friends of his, and Lip was here as well. The people beside him continued to speak to him, and he did his best to focus on them, but couldn’t help but look at Ian often. He was simply talking and having drinks for now.

“Got your eyes on something?” Asked Sam

He knew he was gay, and while he would often joke about it, he didn’t seem to be really bothered by it. He gave a little smirk: “Your club definitely has some nice options.”

“Oh, we have many; you’re welcome any night, as long as you respect our little agreement.”

“Please, Sam, you know I wouldn’t forget something like that. No mess in a friend’s house!”

While the term friend was often meaningless in the mob, he was actually quite fond of Sam, and he especially meant what he was saying. Causing a mess in another boss’s territory would be borderline suicidal. He wouldn’t necessarily get killed for that, but it would definitely be a threat for his place among the mob, and it was too precious to him. After all, this new status and his son were the only true pride of his life right now. And to take care of the latter as well as he wished, he needed to keep the former.

Eventually, Sam went to dance with a beautiful brunet while Iggy was still grinding with some bimbo.

Mickey looked at Ian, oh he was sexier than anyone in the room to him. He was talking to some black guy…Wait…He stood up and watched them as they went to the dance floor. His eyes widened and it was as if a knife had been thrown in his stomach. His head felt like bursting out of lust and jealousy, a burning, aching jealousy.

Ian was grinding and moving his hips sexily against the guy, either facing him or sexily rubbing his back against the guy’s chest. He felt like he was being punched in the chest again, as if he was being betrayed and humiliated before everyone. A little voice in his head tried to remind him he wasn’t with Ian anymore, but he wouldn’t listen to it. Anger and deception were too loud. The red-head took the bottom of his shirt between his teeth, lifting the cloth enough to let people see his pale, toned chest…He heard girls cheering with excitement, but they didn’t matter. What mattered was the way Ian seemed to lust for the guy, and how the man would put his hands on him, brush his lips against his face…He approached them, determined to beat the fucker down and take Ian away for himself.

A hand on his shoulder stopped him: “Mickey, stop it, this place belongs to Bodevick,” Iggy reminded him. “Any mess would be like an affront. You’ll get him later.”

“What, that fucker dancing with him?”

“He or Ian, whatever, but you have to do that out of the club, please.”

It took all of Mickey’s self-control to listen to him. He looked one last time to Ian who had his back at the guy. They spoke to each other, and Ian stuck out his tongue before bending his knees, sliding down against the man _._ Little devil… The fire of his hips… _I won’t let you go._ The envy and self-hatred were hard to bear as well, almost making him want to cry. What a fool he had been…Ian…

He passed a hand through his hair. He had to stop this! He couldn’t keep on lamenting! Otherwise he would just break! Now it was time to act! He wasn’t that weak man playing tough anymore! He became someone, he had power now and he had to show it!

He started to feel angry at Ian. He was going on with his life, unaffected by all of it, as if their reunion had meant nothing at all! Now that he thought about it, Mickey wasn’t the only one at fault in this! He had been willing to continue their relationship in spite of the marriage, hadn’t he? He came to Ian after the marriage, tried to talk to him, but the redhead was the one who didn’t listen! He wasn’t the one who truly gave up, Ian did! Yes, he had beaten him, but he was going through something hard! And he came back! Even after two years of separation, he still loved him! And the redhead just refused, acting as if Mickey was only a stranger! Little tempter…

He waited a bit, until Ian went to the bathroom. Mickey followed him in. The redhead was just passing water on his face to refresh himself; he looked surprised when he saw Mickey. The brunet smirked bitterly.

“Having fun?”

“What are you doing here? Did you follow me?”

Yes, but he wasn’t going to say it. “No, that place belongs to a friend of mine, I came to visit him. Speaking about friends, who is that guy?”

“It’s not your business but he is my boyfriend.”

He envied that boyfriend as much as he hated him! He was about to leave when Mickey gripped his arm. Ian had been disgusted by the coward of the past? Well, he would show him what kind of man he was now! He wasn’t just a little thug, he was a mobster, and no one should mess with him.

“You think you can walk away like that?”

“Well, yeah! What the hell do you think you are doing?”

Mickey smirked again and simply stated: “You didn’t ask me what I became, didn’t you?”

Ian frowned at that question. Mickey didn’t let him time to speak before saying: “No one walks away from me.”

He left the bathroom and the stunned red-head. Saying goodbye to Sam, he left the club as well. It was only a matter of time: he would get Ian back…There was no way he would let him get away like that! He wanted him at his side, and he wanted to punish him as well. He wanted him to be hurt, to suffer as much as Mickey suffered! It wasn’t over, oh no!

**O o O**

Ian was going to work that morning. Debbie was going to school, as usual. It seemed like it would be a normal day. He would go on foot, he didn’t have a car, now that Debbie was living with him he couldn’t spend money on that. Carl had suggested he could steal one, but he refused. Lip and he got time to speak about it. Their brother would need help, but how could they persuade his boss to leave him alone?

It wasn’t the only thing bothering him. Mickey…He didn’t know what to think of their encounter. And what was that thing in the bathroom; he said no one walked away from him? It had been strange, very strange…

He was so deep in his thoughts that he didn’t notice a car stopping at his level.

Hands suddenly grabbed his arms and before he could try to fight against the person holding him, he felt a gun pressed against his back. He stopped moving immediately. Two men were at each side of him, one holding him, the other threatening him with the firearm. _Oh shit…Keep your cool, don’t panic._

“Follow us, not a sound.”

He had no choice but to obey, he entered with them in a car, the man with the gun sat at his side, guarding while the other drove away. Nervousness and fear invaded him, he had already been in dangerous situation, but the problem was he couldn’t run away or try to defend himself. He had to be careful, but he wanted nothing but explode.

“What the fuck are you doing?”

“Do you really need to ask? You shouldn’t have messed up with the Mob, you know.”

“What?!”

“Shut up.”

The rest of the travel was silent. What the hell did he do? Was it about Carl? Did his brother really got in trouble? Maybe those guys were hurting Ian to send a warning to his little brother. Was he going to die? Were they taking him in a quiet place to murder him? They were driving him into a richer street, and finally stopped in a building’s private parking lot. Ian still had thousands of questions when he was brought into a flat. What the hell was happening? The men roughly pushed him inside a room before closing the door. Ian was still stunned but he was even more struck when he saw none other than Mickey. Mickey?! What!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ouch! Things went south! Don’t hesitate to comment, it’s always nice to know what you think.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! Here is the confrontation between the two, hope you'll enjoy it!

Mickey…Mickey was the one who did that! Mickey kidnapped him! Confusion was too small of a word to describe what he was feeling right now. The brunet approached him with a smugness which made his blood boil.

“Missed me?”

“Dafuq, you bastard!” With that he roughly pushed Mickey.

“Are you really that surprised?”

“Surprised? Am I surprised when two thugs put a gun on my back and kidnap me?! The fuck am I doing here?!”

That was the moment, Mickey felt exhilarated. Seeing Ian here and knowing already that he wouldn’t escape… “Do you remember when I told you no one walked away from me? I meant it.”

Ian was stunned at this. What the hell was happening?! His eyes fell on the gun on Mickey’s belt.  “So what? You’re going to kill me?”

Mickey laughed at this: “Kill you? No! Why the fuck would I do that? I want you alive and well, you can be sure of that. I want you with me.”

He put a hand on Ian’s chest twisting the fabric of his shirt a bit. The red-head was obviously confused but fear grew in his eyes, maybe he was starting to understand. Those green eyes, those red hair, those lips slightly trembling from the shock…He seized his neck and pulled him into a kiss. It felt so good! What a fool he had been for not kissing Ian during all that time! He was pushed away and Ian tried to punch him but Mickey grabbed his wrist and pulled him closer to his chest.

“Still fierce! At least you didn’t lose that.”

“The fuck do you think you’re doing?! It’s no, Mickey, I’m not staying here!”

“I’m sorry, when did I say you had a fucking choice?”

It felt like he had been struck by lightning. What the hell did he mean by that?! He wasn’t easily scared, but here he was starting to be afraid. Mickey savored Ian’s face as he was starting to realize what this meant. _How does it feel when you’re the one being hurt?_ His prisoner freed himself from his grip.

“You kidnapped me to force me to stay with you?”

“Since you didn’t come willingly, I had to resort to other ways.”

The red-head punched him in the guts and the mobster was bent in half. He recovered quickly though, grabbed Ian’s arm before he could punch him again and pushed him against the wall roughly, pinning him against it.

“Stop that, in the best interest of your family, you should behave!”

“What?”

This made the redhead still; Ian’s eyes were wide, stunned at the mention of his family: “You might have already guessed that, but I work with people who…have influence. I have some influence myself.”

He remembered what the man in the care said: he had messed up with the Mob…”You’re part of the mafia, aren’t you?”

“Indeed. We already control half of Chicago, and there are many ways I could mess your siblings’ lives up.”

Fear grew stronger. No, this couldn’t be happening! He couldn’t allow that! “Don’t put my family into this!”

“Try to stop me!”

“Do you really think you can come back here and take me as if I was just some old furniture?  I have a life! I have a job, a boyfriend! I have to take care of Debbie!” He yelled.

This was getting good, really good. Ian cared for his little sister, he was definitely into his trap. “Yeah, little Debbie. She will struggle with her baby.” He said while grazing Ian’s neck. The redhead pushed his fingers away angrily: “We’re helping her, now stop this shit and let me go!”

He loved that with him: Ian was a challenge, not an obedient little bitch. Maybe that was the reason why dominating him was feeling so good. “You mean you’re the one helping her, right? Alone, with one paycheck…She’ll still have to work, drop school, maybe. Do you really want that for her? Being a teenage mom is a fragile situation, it wouldn’t be the right moment for her to get in trouble.” Mickey extended a hand to touch his face but the redhead shifted away from his touch. He was feeling sick…

Mickey let go of him, leaving Ian standing against the wall. The brunet leaned against his desk like some businessman. Ian didn’t try to leave, the threat wouldn’t allow him to go anywhere and they both knew that. “You know, even if I’m a criminal, there is one thing I’m rigorous about: I help my people. Whether they are men working for me, or people close to me. You see, I don’t like my wife much, but she still has everything she needs and she doesn’t have to whore herself out. So what wouldn’t I do for my lover? The one I truly want at my side?”

His tone suddenly got a bit darker: “However, when someone makes me angry, well…I don’t hesitate to be nasty. But you already know that.”

Ian was unable to speak. He understood too clearly what this meant, what he would have to do…It was making him sick but he couldn’t endanger his siblings! He breathed harder and Mickey knew he won; Ian understood who the boss here was.

“If you stay with me, I’ll take care of you and of your family. But if you refuse, I’ll make your lives a living hell.” There was no need to spell it out, yet mickey wanted to do it. It was satisfying.

He approached Ian again, walking over him with confidence, smugness even. He loved to show him he was in charge.

“You’re fucking disgusting!”

Mickey snorted: “You should have thought about that before dancing like this with some twink at the club. Even though I must admit that was pretty hot.”

 “Is that why you came to threaten me that night? Because you saw me dancing?”

“Was he just some guy or your boyfriend?”

Ian didn’t answer at this, he didn’t want to speak of Caleb further, this could be dangerous.

“How many guys did you got?”

“That’s none of your concern. How many people did you fuck? Did you fuck men? Or maybe you had some women to pretend you’re not gay.”

Mickey gave him a little smirk: “Seems like you’re asking yourself a lot of questions about that.”

Ian was about to answer when his phone rang. The brunet plunged his hand in Ian’s pocket; though his prisoner tried to stop him, he got the phone and saw a name: Caleb. “Is that him?” Ian's worried stare was enough to answer him. He wanted to be cruel right now, time to start the punishment and it would be really satisfying! He gave it back.

“Answer it, go ahead. After all, he has to know that you want to break up.”

“No fucking way! I won’t do that, you hear me?!”

“Too bad…Tell me, when will Debbie come back from school? Maybe she’ll walk with Carl. I heard he was starting to behave like a good boy again. Should I send him a little reminder that he can’t quit the game? Should I involve Debbie in that warning?”

He saw Ian quivering a bit, his face was full of despair. The phone stopped ringing and the redhead looked completely defeated. He took a deep breath, and Mickey grabbed his wrist gently: “You can take your time to call him back, think of what you’re gonna say.”

The redhead was still silent, his eyes had such an intense look, full of fury, fear and sadness…It was pure fire, nothing like the ice he had seen during their reunion. The young man was obviously suffering. There was some kind of weird satisfaction in that, he was in control here, he was in charge and Ian couldn’t mock him or push him away anymore! He was making him pay! He murmured at his ear: “You won’t see him again. You are mine now, got it?”

Ian felt sick again. He imagined Caleb being confused and heart-broken after he would ditch him…He was a good man and he really liked him…But he also imagined Carl and Debbie suddenly being cornered and attack by thugs…This wasn’t even a choice. He took a deep breath. “You really won’t listen to me?”

“The question is: will _you_ listen? Do as I say…And I’ll do my best to make sure Carl can get out of the game without problems. No one will bother him.” At this, a little spark of hope passed through the green eyes. The phone rang again, Caleb was calling once more. Mickey leaned toward his ear and whispered softly and threateningly: “Think carefully of what you’ll say.”

The redhead just answered the call: “Hey Caleb…Hum, no that won’t be possible…I’m fine, but I can’t come…Listen, I thought over it all,” he hesitated and Mickey gave him a pressuring look. “I don’t think we can go on like this…I mean that I don’t think this will work…No, you did nothing wrong, I assure you, it’s me, it’s really me…I know it’s sudden, I wished I didn’t do it on phone…No, I don’t think we can meet…Look, I’m really sorry, but I have to hung up.”

He hung up and tried his best not to let his face wince. He had a hard time not to let tears fall. Caleb had been confused and heart-broken, just as he thought. And it had been incredibly painful to do that to him.

The sight of Ian’s sadness suddenly brought Mickey back to the day Frank had surprised the two of them at Kash’n Grab. He had told Ian was nothing to him but a warm mouth…His eyes had the same look. And he also had those eyes the day he came to tell him he couldn’t marry…Guilt rose fiercely and he did his best to push it away. It had to be done. Anyway he could give him much more than this fucker, couldn’t he? He started to cup his cheek but Ian pushed his hand away angrily. Mickey stepped away slightly:

“I want you to say it clearly: do you accept this or not?”

“I have no choice, so yes: I do accept.”

A smirk grew on his face. There, he finally had him. “Good. You’ll go home and pick up some stuff of yours. No weapons of course.”

Ian was confused at this: he could go out? Mickey snorted: “Did you think I would keep you locked in there all day? You can go out freely, except when I’ll want to spend time with you. You know what will happen if you don’t come back, don’t you?” Ian nodded slowly. “Then you can go. Be back as soon as possible.”

Ian gave him a hateful glare before leaving. Mickey smirked and sighed in satisfaction: it felt somehow good to dominate him, to know he would have to come back and to know this time he wouldn’t leave.

**O o O**

Just as he expected, the red-head came back later this evening with a sport bag. Mickey told him where his room was in order to let him settle in. Ian didn’t speak one word to him. He found the bathroom quickly enough and took a shower. He was feeling dirty already. Debbie had been home when he came back, and he had explained her that he wouldn’t be here anymore for some times. She had asked him why but he refused to explain her, not yet at least, he wasn’t ready. How could he tell his little sister what he would do? That he would have to be Mickey’s lover? He quickly got dressed in night clothes. What should he do, now? He was startled when he heard someone tap the door.

“Ian, get the hell out of here and into the bedroom.”

He answered nothing and just listened to footsteps growing distant. Oh, he hated that! He hated to have to obey, but what could he do? He had agreed to do this…He went in the bedroom and looked at it. It was quite classy and large, he had to admit it, but it was also cold, without much personality. As if this was nothing but some kind of motel room, it was only functional and neat.  

When Mickey came in, he saw Ian leaning against the wall in his night clothes, arms crossed and an anxious expression on his face. He checked him out freely. He had matured in two years, he still looked attractive, but not in the same boyish way. He was manlier and a bit more mysterious.

“I missed that sight.”

“What’s gonna happen, now?” Asked Ian.

“What do you mean?”

“You want me to be your lover. So, do I have to perform some kind of duty or do you wanna make me bottom?”

“…I don’t want to rape you if that’s what you fear. I’d rather have you willingly.”

“Sorry to tell you that, but threatening my pregnant little sister and the rest of my family is hardly a way to make me hot and heavy.”

At those words, Mickey couldn’t help but feel a pan of guilt. He knew he was doing something wrong, but he couldn’t go on like this. And damn, this is what he was aiming for; he wanted Ian to be hurt as he had been! He wanted to get back at him. Those last years had been a mess, even if he had succeeded on the outside, he had felt drained inside, empty, as if he could get no real happiness, as if all he could do was struggling while trying to reach something ungraspable. For the first time since he was forced to marry, since he left Chicago, he felt like he finally got what he needed. He approached Ian and grazed his bare arm. Ian shifted slightly to escape his touch.

“You’re under my skin. What can I do?”

“Find yourself another fucking guy, one who will actually want this!”

“Don’t you think I’ve tried? I actually got my hands on a pretty ginger, a nice-looking guy. But he was nothing compared to you. None of the guys I fucked just to try to feel better were able to make me feel like you did.”

He expected those words to have effect on him, he thought the redhead would be flattered, but instead he just looked angry. Ian was indeed pretty pissed off: to think Mickey threw him away only to sleep with many boys after that! That fierce expression made his captor even more lustful strangely.

“If you don’t want to fuck, fine. But I want you to let me kiss you and touch you, that’s the least.”

Ian took a deep breath. It was still wrong, but it could be worse…He hoped Mickey meant that, it would be a lot more bearable if he wasn’t coerced into having sex. “Kissing and touching…Guess I can handle it. What else will I have to do?”

“You’ll live with me, you’ll be at my side when I’ll go out, accompany me to dinner and stuff and sleep in my bed. Only sleep as long as you don’t want to fuck.”

Ian felt a bit sick again. “So you’ll show me to everyone as your little caged prize?”

Mickey’s mouth twitched at this. “You aren’t a prize. We don’t have to tell anyone about our arrangement. That can stay between those walls. To the eyes of the outside world, we can simply be a couple.”

He relaxed a bit at this. Mickey could understand, pride was essential for guys like them who lived in shitty ghettos and with shittier parents. He couldn’t kill Ian’s pride.

“You said you wouldn’t have me locked here all day. Does this mean I can go back to work?”

“Work as an EMT? No.”

“Seriously?!”

“I’m not about to see you leave at any moment of the day or night because of some jackass who crashed his car. Anyway, I live between Detroit and Chicago, you’ll have to follow me whenever I move.”

This time, Ian pushed him away harshly. He was once again all tense and angry, worse than earlier; he looked like he wanted to beat the shit out of him. Mickey was taken aback at this, while he expected that with the boyfriend, he didn’t think Ian would react like that for a job.

“You fucker!”

“It’s only a fucking job, relax.”

Those words made even angrier. No it wasn’t! His job was something he was proud of, he had made a perfect score at the exam, it had made him respectable and he was saving lives. It was what allowed him to help Debbie. He had worked for it, worked hard. And now, it was all going down…

“It mattered to me! I never thought you would do something like that!”

“I didn’t think you would forget me so easily, and yet you did.”

This took the breath out of Ian’s lungs. Now that was the last drop! “Forget you? It’s me who was eager to forget you?! You ignored me, you beat me up, then you married! You dare to speak as if you knew! I almost begged you not to marry! Do you know how I felt back then? How hard it was to get back on my feet?!”

This made Mickey gap slightly, he was quite stunned at those words. He had been so sure that Ian got over him more easily than he did…But there had been pain in his voice…“You never gave that impression,” he murmured.

“Because I didn’t want to! I couldn’t dwell on that; my family needed me! But Jesus, Mick, I was broken inside! It was Mandy and my siblings who made me want to stand up! Do you know why I worked hard at school? To focus on anything else but you! So don’t speak as if I had it easy because you have no fucking right to do that!”

The man was silent at this. Eventually, he murmured: “You were right back then: I love you and I’m gay. I couldn’t be honest with myself and with you. Now I can…”

“Oh yeah? Sure that your dad won’t come and…”

“He is dead, Ian.”

This was maybe the first time Mickey announced something which made him feel right tonight. He was happy to know this fucking son of a bitch was dead once and for all, that was no loss. Yet he never heard of that, Mandy didn’t tell him. “Pretty convenient for you, I guess you can call yourself lucky...”

“It’s not a matter of luck, I put that old fucker down.”

Ian’s eyes widened at this: Mickey killed his father? Killing a parent was extreme, yet this was Terry. With a smirk, Mickey went on: “I also had to wound Joey. He tried to kill me, called me a fag. I told him to choose between dad and me and he made his choice. I shot him in the knee, he is still alive but he’ll never walk normally again. Iggy joined me, he was smarter.”

Ian was even more stunned. Joey as well?! With that, Mickey circled his neck, passed his other arm around Ian’s back and kissed him. It was hungry and demanding, it stilled the red-head completely at first. He was now used to Caleb’s gentleness, he liked it, so the roughness didn’t felt as good as it used to. Mickey felt like he was getting something he had missed for years…Ian finally pulled away and looked at him with a heartbreaking look:

“You maimed your own brother, you captured me, you blackmailed me…What happened to you?”

Mickey shrugged: “Maybe I’m just not holding back anymore.”

With that, he embraced and kissed him again. This time Ian didn’t resist. He had to let him do that, it was part of their agreement. This didn’t feel like back then anymore, he was too angry at Mickey, yet memories of the time he wished to kiss him came back to Ian. Memories of the time when touching Mickey felt good…He found himself being pushed down on the bed and Mickey was over him, pinning him, still kissing and stroking him. At a point it felt almost smothering, Mickey’s lips were everywhere on his face, neck and even his upper chest. Ian imagined that he had reunited with Mickey willingly, and for a short moment, it actually worked, he felt a thrill, but was soon called back to reality by teeth sinking into the crook of his neck.

“Mickey!”

The man stopped sucking on his skin and Ian breathed more normally. “I fucking missed you, you can’t imagine how much. You obsessed me…”

“Stop it…”

“You said you were broken inside…We can catch up on that.”

He kissed him again, he needed him so badly it almost hurt; Ian was truly his obsession indeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was kinda rough I guess. Yeah, by the way, don't expect rape; there will be a lot of sexual tension for sure. Don't hesitate to review!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! Hope you're having a good summer! Thanks to everyone who reviewed, it's always nice to read your comments!

Waking up with Mickey’s arm embracing him would have probably made Ian feel very happy a few years ago. This morning, though, it was different. Mickey had his arm tightly wrapped around his chest and Ian could feel his weight against him. He had been true to his words, there had been no sex. Still, the touches and kisses had been enough. Even sleeping like this felt incredibly weird and invasive in some way, the man had kept him in his arms during the entire night. He had hardly slept, thinking of everything. It was so surreal! Mickey, the guy with whom he used to sneak in the back of Kash’s store to have sex, the one with whom he did mischief as teenagers, was now a mobster threatening him to destroy his family to get him!

Taking Mickey’s arm as gently as possible not to wake him up, Ian freed himself slowly from his grasp. He went out of the bedroom and to the living room. He was surprised to find two people: a man sitting on the couch, watching TV, and a woman putting on her jacket, preparing to leave. He didn’t know the woman but the man was Iggy Milkovich.

“Hi,” the girl said to him before turning to Iggy: “Will you call me back?”

“Maybe.”

She rolled her eyes and left the flat. Iggy looked at Ian, not surprised at all by his presence.

“I thought you would be more bruised than this, Mickey was pretty pissed off.” 

Ian advanced toward him. “Yeah, I got that already. So you know about all this.”

“Of course I do! My brother and I live together, how could I not know? Must say it’s kinda funny to see your face again, it brings back memories.”

Ian was absolutely struck by this: “You know your brother is basically keeping me with blackmail?”

“Yeah. Do you think that shit is unusual for people like us? Now, we usually don’t kidnap the person, a simple visit and a little threat is all that is needed. But in the end it’s the same, right?”

Ian was pretty horrified, though he tried not to show how he was feeling. He wasn’t that surprised, that was maybe the worst; horrified, but not surprised. After all, mafia was composed of people who would threaten, steal, maim and kill with no remorse, so keeping someone by force was probably not a big deal to them.

“Did you do that often?”

“Me? No, I don’t keep girls for long anyway, so whenever they get the fuck off, I don’t try to hold them back.”

“So you don’t care that your brother is…”

“Gay? Nah, I don’t give a shit anymore. I don’t think I ever did. The day he told us, I realized it didn’t matter. If anything, I’m sure that Mickey will never compete against me for a chick, which is good.”

“I was about to say ‘keeping someone against their will’.”

Iggy just shrugged: “I guess it’s better if the other wants it. But he didn’t fuck you by force? No. So don’t bitch about it. Could be worse, believe me.”

To tell the truth, Iggy didn’t like rapists at all, and he didn’t know if he could have accepted it if Mickey had fucked Ian by force. But his brother didn’t want that, he was in love with him, so it was right, wasn’t it? He was so used to live surrounded by horrors since childhood that in comparison, Mickey’s actions didn’t seem that bad. Mickey wouldn’t rape Ian, he would give him a nice place to live, would treat him as his boyfriend…That wasn’t the worst thing which could happen to someone. Ian could have thought the same if he had been the teenager he used to be. But he wasn’t.

Not raping him was certainly not making up for kidnapping him and threatening his family, for coercing him into this! He had every right to refuse Mickey’s advances on him; it should have been his choice whether or not he wanted to give affection back. Mickey had no right to rape him, no matter what! It would have been pure cruelty to abuse or manhandle him further than he already did! And Ian wouldn’t feel grateful because his ex didn’t push cruelty farther than that; Mickey should have respected his choice. What did he expect to come out of this situation?

He didn’t bother explaining that to Iggy, the guy wasn’t exactly the brightest of all, and Mickey was his brother. He wished Mandy was here, she would have spoke on his behalf. They heard noises and Mickey walked out of his bedroom. He kissed Ian who didn’t respond and spoke to his brother:

“Remember we’re leaving today?”

“Yep, it’s about time. Batista sent you a message.”

“Leaving today?” Asked Ian.

“We’re going to Detroit. We’ll stay here for some times,” Mickey summed up.

This was a shock. They were leaving? He remembered Mickey saying he lived between Detroit and Chicago, but he didn’t think they would go so soon. “And you couldn’t say that before?!”

“We had a lot to talk about. And anyway you would have to come.”

That’s all Mickey said before looking at his phone and Ian quickly eat something before dressing up. He was mad, but he couldn’t beat the shit out of Mickey. He would leave Chicago…He realized he never went to Detroit before, in fact, he hadn’t left his city that much. Now, he was going to an unknown place where the only people he would know were the ones holding him captive. He sighed and rubbed his forehead. He couldn’t delay telling his family. Debbie was the most important, she would be the first impacted by this. He would also have to tell Fiona, and his brothers…He didn’t feel ready to tell Lip at all.

“I hope you didn’t unpack everything you brought.”

He turned round to see Mickey in the doorframe. “Leave me alone. I have to go and see my sisters…I guess I also have to explain my boss that I’m quitting.”

“What about Debbie, where will she go?”

Ian was surprised at Mickey’s question: “Well, I hope Fiona can take her back.”

“If it’s not possible, I can arrange to find her a place to stay.”

“A place to stay?”

“Some people owe me favor and could take her under their roof. Not mobsters, don’t worry.”

“…Thanks but I think we’ll manage. Debbie doesn’t need to end up in some stranger’s house like back then when we would be put into foster care.”

Mickey didn’t answer anything, he could understand that feeling. It would have been a big revenge to have Debbie ending in someone else’s place whether she or Ian liked it or not. The redhead would have gone crazy. He decided to toy with him a bit.

“What if I decide this is better for her?”

“…You’re not the one to decide of that.”

“I think I am. After all it would be good to have her with someone I can order around, someone who would keep her under their watch for me. That way, whenever you do something wrong…”

He didn’t end his sentence, just to let Ian’s imagination work. He regretted those words immediately, though. Ian looked so repulsed at this it was almost sickening.

“Are you threatening a pregnant girl? Are you that low?” He didn’t let Mickey answer. “You know, Mandy always liked Debbie. Tell me, what your sister would think of you if she heard what you just said?! If she heard about any of that?!”

This was a hard blow. He didn’t think of that; what would Mandy think indeed?

“Don’t put your pants in a twist; I was trying to scare you. I said I wouldn’t hurt your family as long as you agreed to stay, and I’ll keep my word.” He took a deep breath and went on: “As for Mandy, she left me. I don’t want to interfere with her life, she won’t interfere with mine.”

“You wanted to scare me?! Don’t you think you’ve already done enough for that? Now, how can I know you really didn’t mean it?”

Mickey advanced toward him abruptly, meaning to intimidate Ian but the young man didn’t move an inch. He saw repulsion again, and that wasn’t what he wanted. What he had been aiming for was fear, pain, but Ian just seemed angry and disgusted.

“My word mean something, I repeat it to you. I have nothing against Debbie, I have no need to hurt her. But I will, if you make me. Remember it, Ian: her future is in your hands. Same with the rest of your family.”

Ian snorted and walked away from him. Mickey felt foolish: what did he expect? This was a Gallagher, _Ian Gallagher_ , not some poor damsel in distress. The redhead wouldn’t just faint and weep at a threat like this; he was from the South Side, he was used to fight. Some people would have been unable to react, but Ian was different.

He dressed up and found him in the living room, looking through the picture window. Iggy was in the shower, they were alone. He stood right behind Ian, his chest grazing his back and put his arms around his waist. His chin went on Ian’s shoulder and he could feel his captive tense. There was something thrilling by standing in such an intimate way, before the huge window. It was as if he was claiming to the world that he loved Ian, with no shame. Holding him like that, while looking at the city, he felt as if the world belonged to him. He smirked with satisfaction:

“Don’t worry. Debbie will stay wherever she wants. _If_ she needs helps, I will provide, but only if you ask.”

“And what about Carl? You meant it when you said that he would quit the game safely?”

“You have my word on that.”

Ian could have told him that his word hardly meant something to him, but hold himself back. His siblings’ lives depended on it. So, swallowing his pride, he murmured: “Thanks.”

Mickey embraced him tighter, pressing his back furthermore against his chest. Ian couldn’t help but think it would have been sweet to have Mickey holding him like that in the past. But now…Mickey was ready to give Ian everything he used to want, but only after disgusting him. That was probably fucking fate toying with them. Ian tried to find something to say, anything, just to break the discomfort.

“When do we have to leave?”

“This afternoon.”

Ian felt almost dizzy at this. So soon?! “I have to go and see my sisters,” he mumbled.

“As you wish, but you’ll have to be there by 3pm.”

“Alright…” he sighed.

He sent a text to Debbie and Fiona, telling them to find him as soon as possible to the Gallagher’s house. He left the flat and took the subway. Once he arrived at his old house, he couldn’t help but reminisce what happened _that_ day. The day where his world was broken and slowly rebuilt again.

_“You love me…And you’re gay.”_

_Kneeling on the ground after receiving a punch in the stomach from Mickey, he still wouldn’t give up. There was no way he could let Mickey do such a stupid mistake! He couldn’t marry some whore just to hide the truth from his father!_

_“Admit it!” A punch in the face followed, stabbing Ian through the heart and making him fall. Mickey was pacing madly, and Ian couldn’t shut up yet. “Feeling better now?! Feeling like a man?!”_

_The kick in the face which followed managed to silence him. Mickey was gone when he regained his spirit. He went home, feeling absolutely defeated and heartbroken. One beating from Terry, and Mickey was giving up! Was he that unimportant to Mickey that he couldn’t muster the courage to stand up for him?! Would he really keep losing everyone important to him?! His father had never cared about him, and his mother…She had broken his heart many times! She had been so nice to him, telling him he had nothing to be ashamed of, and then left again…And now it was Mickey…Was something wrong with him? It seemed incredibly easy for people to leave him!_

_He couldn’t help but think about it again and again. That woman on Mickey, fucking him like this right under his eyes! At a point, it seemed like Mickey had enjoyed it. It had been like a cruel reminder that Mickey would never be with him, would never accept what he was. He had just been reminded of it again._

_Once he got home, he immediately went in bed, he didn’t want to see anyone, nor talk to anyone. Anyway, they all seemed to be too busy with their own stuff to bother about him. It was always like that in this house: they were all so preoccupied with survival that no one really cared! His face contorted and he started to cry. How could this happen?! Mickey…He even kissed him once! And now he was kicking him in the face! Frustration, anger and sadness made him want to throw up. He heard light footsteps behind him and someone sat on the bed. He was facing the wall, he couldn’t see, but he understood it was Fiona when a soft and thin hand caressed his cheek._

_“Ian? What’s wrong?”_

_He didn’t answer, and she continued to stroke his cheek._

_“Is it Mickey?”_

_He looked at her in surprise. He never told her that he was going out with Mickey. Yet Fiona obviously figured out, just like she had figured out about him being gay._

_“Leave me alone.”_

_“Tell me what’s happening, please. Did you got beaten? Your face…”_

_“It’s over!” He sobbed, feeling pathetic. “He’ll never be with me. I don’t want it to be over!”_

_“I understand, honey. Believe me, I do.”_

_Ian swallowed the lump in his throat, realizing it was true. Fiona went through shit lately. “…Because of Jimmy,” he murmured in a sob-filled voice._

_She nodded and he sat up, looking miserable. She embraced him softly and he returned the hug eagerly. She asked him what happened and he told her everything. He had to spill it out to someone. How Terry surprised them, how he made a prostitute sleep with Mickey, holding them at gun point, and how Mickey was marrying now. Fiona was horrified to hear that._

_“Oh God! That’s horrible! I’m sorry…I didn’t think something so horrible happened to you! You should have told me!”_

_“It wouldn’t have changed anything.”_

_She rubbed his shoulder comfortingly: “Ian, I know I’m often busy with a lot of stuff, and because you’re pretty independent, I don’t often take the time to speak with you. But believe me, I care about you, and I love you. If you need me, I’m there. We have to be here for each other, especially now that Lip is leaving.” She took his cheek gently and made him look at her: “We can go through that together. Let me be here for you, please. I love you. You’re a fighter, we’re both fighters, and we can be stronger than this.”_

_He let out some tears, but this time, it wasn’t only out of sadness. His sister’s words touched him deeply._

_“I love you, Fi.”_

_“I love you, Ian.”_

_He hugged her once more, she really was the only parental figure he had. At least, she was there…Maybe not everybody was abandoning him after all._

_He thought deeply over the days. He was tempted to run away, to enlist in the army, but the more he thought about it, the more it felt cowardish. He would just do like Mickey: running away. He didn’t want to do that. His relationship with Mickey failed; did that mean he had to fail his sister? His entire family? Lip would be away, he couldn’t leave them too. He would fight. One day, as he was alone with Mandy, he spilled it out._

_“I had something with your brother. We were lovers at a point.”_

_She was surprised, but she didn’t seem to be angry or anything. When he told her the whole story, she was sorry for him. She hugged him, just like Fiona did._

_“My father is an asshole, I’m sorry this happened. I’ll speak with Mickey.”_

_“Don’t bother. I don’t want anyone to interfere, it would change nothing.”_

_“You and Mickey. Me and Lip. Fiona and Jimmy…Everything is crumbling, it seems.”_

_“You and Lip are still together.”_

_“I don’t think we will be for long. At least I still have you.”_

_“Yeah…Just don’t wonder why I won’t go to your house anymore. You can still come to my place though.”_

_“You bet I will…Ian…I know it’s useless to say that, but I wished you were straight and we ended up together.”_

_“Yeah…Sometimes I wish it too.”_

_Mandy was so committed, nice, funny and loyal…She could have been a great person for him. When he thought Lip acted like a douche bag to her…Men could be really stupid at times. He kissed the top of her head. Yes, she had him. He went to the wedding but stayed away from his boyfriend. He saw Mickey putting on with this farce and felt even worse. Yet he was also determined, and seeing this fueled his wish to prove he was stronger than this idiot. He would go on with what he planned, he wouldn’t give up on his family and Mandy. If Mickey decided to ditch him for some whore, well, Ian would remain with the people who loved him._

_The next months passed with some difficulty. He worked at school better than usual to try to forget and helped Mandy with her own grades. He helped Fiona with the house, worked and took care of Liam whenever it was needed. He met a few guys but never had more than a one-night stand. Mickey tried to speak with him a few times, but he would always go away and avoid him. He wanted to move on. Fiona and he got somehow closer than before and life at home was actually not bad at all._

_One day, Mandy came over. She looked upset and Ian, who was making Liam eat, saw it immediately._

_“Mandy? What’s wrong?”_

_“Mickey’s moving away.”_

_He had decided to move on, he had been able to ignore Mickey and go on with his life. So why did it felt like a stab?_

_“Where?”_

_“Detroit. He associated with some people and…He has to get away. Apparently, he’ll have a new job there. Svetlana is following him with the baby.”_

_“Carl, can you take care of Liam?”_

_His little brother replaced him and he went with her outside, on the porch._

_“I can’t believe he is leaving. He is…He is pretty much the only I could rely on. My other brothers are idiots, and my father…Well, he is what he is.”_

_“What about Kenyatta?”_

_“Nothing much. He is there, that’s all.”_

_He took her hand and squeezed it tightly. She seemed about to drown, just like him._

_“Maybe I should leave too.”_

_“You would do that?” Asked he._

_“Why not? The fact I was born here doesn’t mean I should end up here. And I don’t think there is much left for me.”_

The sound of the door opening got him out of his thoughts. His sisters looked concerned and confused. Why would Ian ask them to come in the middle of the day like this? It was difficult to explain them, how could he say that he would have to be someone’s lover if he didn’t want his family to be hurt? Once they heard what was happening both, were completely horrified. That was absolutely surreal! Mickey Milkovich seriously did that?!

“Fuck…That fucked up!”

“He can’t do this to you!” Debbie exclaimed, shocked

“Apparently yes. So, that’s why you won’t see me that much around. I won’t be able to take care of you anymore, Debs. I won’t even be able to keep the flat. Fi, I need you to help her.”

“Wait, Ian, what would he do to us if you refuse? It doesn’t matter what he tries. Because we can manage it, we always did,” Fiona reminded him. “We’ve done a bunch of crazy stuff to keep ourselves out of problems, we can do it.”

“No, Fiona. This is not some social services employee or shit like that. It’s the Mob. At best they’ll make you lose your job, make Debbie lose custody of her baby. At best! At worst…I’d prefer not to imagine.”

Hearing those words made her feel torn. The threat was real, she knew it, but she couldn’t let her little brother do that! She couldn’t ask that of him!

“You shouldn’t have to do this for us.”

“Are you kidding? Especially you, Fiona; I owe you a lot, more than you think.”

“What do you mean?”

He took a deep breath: “You remember when Mickey left me? I would have done something stupid if you hadn’t been here to talk to me. You helped me stay on my own two feet. It’s only fair I help you. And Debbie, there is no way I’m letting anyone harm my little sister and niece.”

His little sister shook her head: “But what will happen to you?”

“Yeah, you can’t just throw yourself in that shit! I did what a big sister should do, that doesn’t mean I can ask you to...”

“You’re not asking me, it’s my decision…I’m fine, I can do this. And I want to see your little girl grow up.”

Debbie touched her belly, feeling conflicted. She didn’t want her brother to go through that, but she couldn’t jeopardize her baby’s future like that…What if her little girl was taken away from her? Fiona looked at both of them. They had grown up…She remembered when they were still children, both redheads, both very cute and always ready to help…Now Ian was a young man, and a good one. She hated Mickey Milkovitch for doing that to him, for wrecking everything Ian had build like that! She used to feel sorry for the brunet, because he had been forced to marry, but now that sympathy turned into despise. And he was threatening Debbie too! Her little sister had done mistakes, wrong things, but she didn’t want someone to hurt her.

“Listen, it will be alright. Mickey wants me at his side, he doesn’t want me to serve as his punching bag.”

“You’ll have to…Sleep with him!” Fiona exclaimed, feeling nauseous at her own words.

“He doesn’t force me to do that. I don’t think it’s what matters the most to him anyway, he mostly wants to retrieve what we had.”

“Like what?”

“The relationship we had before, maybe.”

“That’s crazy!” His little sister exclaimed.

“I know, it’ ludicrous. Listen, Debs, all that matter is to give your little girl a nice future.”

“But I wanted us to do that together,” she murmured, her eyes wet.

Oh he had wished that as well, really. His heart felt like he had been stabbed at that moment, seeing her like that, he felt as if he was abandoning her even if he was doing that for her.

“Believe me, I don’t wanna go. I wanted that too; but don’t worry; we’ll be able to do that one day. We’ll live together again and raise that baby. Don’t worry, we’re Gallaghers, we always find a way.”

Fiona bit her lips and passed an arm around Debbie’s shoulder: “Come back home; we’ll take care of that baby together, okay?”

The girl nodded slowly. Ian silently prayed it would work, stood up and both Debbie and Fiona hugged him. He embraced them tightly. He couldn’t do anything but wish that he would really find a way to get away. He kissed Debbie’s forehead one last time. Before leaving, he looked at his two sisters and remembered how things happened, how he almost decided to leave. Staying was the best thing he ever did, unlike Mandy, he had a reason to remain here. He had taken his resolve back then. He handled things the best he could. He handled the situation along with Lip when Liam got almost killed because of Fiona’s cocaine. He helped Debbie as much as possible when she got pregnant. He could handle Mickey now. Fiona had been right: they were fighters, and he would prove it.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it!


	5. Chapter 5

Detroit was huge, that was at least its common point with Chicago. Otherwise, it felt really alien to be in there, in that city which was absolutely unknown to him. Maybe he would have been able to appreciate that city a bit more if he hadn’t been brought here in such a way, but unconsciously he associated it to his captivity. And therefore it looked rotten to him. But to be fair, Detroit was known for its decline. It was night, but he had seen some streets which looked abandoned and poor, and then other parts which were much livelier, dynamic, and beautiful.

“That place is full of opportunity,” Mickey told him. “A lot of people are doing their best to revive it, it’s showing already. So no need to say that anyone who has money and influence can easily builds something…”

“And your boss is doing exactly that.”

“You have no idea.”

They reached Mickey’s house and Ian was surprised to see how neat the neighborhood was. But the more stunning was the new Milkovitch house. It was huge, not in an extravagant way, but still huge, and it looked so…Respectable! Even the garden seemed to be taken care of. Did Mickey had a freaking gardener? The inside was pretty nice as well, and Ian guessed Mickey wasn’t the one who decorated. In fact, he saw two women sitting cross-legged on the couch, watching TV while sipping wine and talking. One was chestnut haired and the other was blond. The first one stood up and walked toward them.

“Good evening, I was wondering when you would arrive.” She had a thick Russian accent, she spoke to Mickey and Iggy before turning to Ian and extending her hand to him: “Pleased to meet you, sir.”

He shook her hand, guessing that she was Mickey’s wife. “Nice to meet you as well.” He didn’t even know what to think of her; he had hated her without knowing her in the past, but now that he had her face to face, he couldn’t decipher his feeling. He realized she never saw him before, she might have never heard of him. It was pointless hating her, especially for a man he hated now.

“You’re one of Mickey’s associates, I presume?”

“No, but he will stay with us.”

Her mouth slightly opened and she nodded, obviously aware of her husband’s habit. The other blond woman came to stand beside her and politely greeted the newcomers, but Mickey didn’t seem to care much about her. She introduced herself as Zika, Svetlana’s friend. Iggy tried to play charming with her but it was obvious his efforts would be pointless.

“Our son was a bit sick. He is better now.”

“Good.”

She looked more like an employee giving info to her boss than a wife greeting her husband home. There was no warmth between them, it was flat, pretty neutral. Mickey led Ian toward his room, this was such a strange situation to pass before the cheated wife without having her batting an eye, but he guessed that in lives as such as theirs, it was coherent. Mickey was almost feeling triumphal; having Ian in his room was something he had dreamed of for a long time. He wanted nothing but to undress him right now, but he perfectly knew Ian didn’t want that at all. And after the way he messed up the Debbie subject, he wasn’t eager to make another mistake.

“You like it, I hope.”

“There is a bed and a heater, it’s all a room needs.”

Mickey snorted, he knew Ian didn’t hate nice things, that was why he slept with rich guys no matter how old they were…He remembered that old dude, gosh he wanted nothing but to bash his head until he died. Did he do that again? Did he have other rich lovers? Without even thinking about it, he embraced him from behind once more, holding him as if he needed to make sure Ian wouldn’t leave again. He kissed the crook of his neck and Ian freed himself from his grip.

“Do you seriously want to keep me as your…Mistress?”

“You’re my lover, if you want to say it’s the same thing as a mistress, fine. People are perfectly aware that my marriage is nothing but a façade we keep for our kid. And they perfectly know that I have lovers,” he murmured while grazing his arm. “By the way you’ll need to buy other clothes, if we go out, you’ll need better stuff.”

“I don’t exactly have the money to buy fancy stuff, you know.”

“I’m not expecting you to pay for it.”

Ian huffed slightly in disbelief: “You’re buying me stuff?”

“Why not? That old dude used to buy you stuff; and I want you to look as I wish.”

Of course…Mickey kissed him again, possessively and almost aggressively. Years ago, when Ian and he started their relationship, he had loved him and hated him at the same time. Mickey loved him for what he was, and hated him because Ian forced him to fact a truth he would have rather ignored. Now, he was able to face that truth, hatred only existed because he couldn’t bear the rejection. Ian Gallagher…Kissing him felt sweetly addictive.

Later, when Mickey was under the shower, Ian tried to think when he heard his phone ringing. He saw Lip’s name on it and his gut tightened. He was pretty sure Fiona or Debbie told him, that was doomed to happen. He breathed in deeply and took it.

“Ian?”

“…Hey, Lip.”

“Listen, Fiona just told me a weird story…”

“That Mickey came back and blackmailed to come and live with him? Yep, that’s entirely true.” It was better to cut the shit now and spell it out. At least he was lucky Mickey wasn’t around.

“…You’re shitting me!”

“I wish.”

He didn’t need to see Lip to know he was furious. He heard Carl’s voice speaking beside Lip, asking what he was saying. Great, Carl was here too…

“Okay…What did he do to you?” Lip asked with a tremor in his voice.

“Nothing, he didn’t force me to sleep with him or anything if that’s what you’re wondering.”

“He didn’t hurt you?”

“…He forced me to break up with Caleb and had me quit my job as well. Does that answer your question?”

Lip sighed at this and then it was Carl speaking to him.

“Hey, you’re doing okay?”

“Hey, Carl. Yeah, it’s…Disturbing but it could be worse.”

“What did he threaten to do?”

Ian didn’t want to tell Carl that Mickey had jeopardized his future without him knowing about it. How could he explain his little brother that Mickey threatened to stop him from leaving the game if Ian didn’t comply?

“Mostly threats against Debbie and Fiona. I guess he could find a way to threaten you and Lip as well if he wanted.” He heard footsteps and Mickey’s voice. “I have to go, I’ll call you later.”

Lip was the one speaking again: “Okay, maybe you should be the one giving us phone calls; maybe it’s safer for you.”

“Yeah, maybe. Bye, guys.”

He knew that his ex wouldn’t mind him talking with his siblings, but he wanted to keep some privacy. He needed it more than ever. At least it hadn’t been as hard as he thought to deal with his brothers. When Mickey came back in the room, he kissed Ian again.

“We’re going to a dinner tomorrow. It will be good to have you with me.”

The redhead didn’t answer anything, he still had his conversation with his siblings in the head. So much had happened in one day, he felt exhausted. He fell asleep in spite of Mickey’s invasive touch.

O o O

The next day, Ian was walking through the streets of Detroit. It felt strange indeed, to see some of those deserted and others much livelier…It could really be a beautiful city again if people tried. Yet Ian perfectly knew that people could often give up even on the most important things. Mickey had given him some money before leaving the house, telling Ian to buy some fancy clothes for tonight. Ian didn’t know what kind of dinner it would be, so he decided he would choose something basic. He got into a shop which looked fancy enough.

When the saleswoman made him try the first suit, he felt like he had been kinda transformed. He wouldn’t dress like a teen anymore, but he would only wear cheap and casual clothes. Here…He really looked like a classy businessman or something like that. it felt so weird, he didn’t know whether he should felt proud or embarrassed to wear such things. He put on his normal clothes once he was done, it would have felt weird to walk out with that. He didn’t imagine how it would feel to wear that for a dinner with Mickey. Where would they go? He continued to walk through the city in order to know it a bit; that way, maybe he would feel a bit more at home.

When he eventually went back to Mickey’s house, his captor was already there. Mickey kissed him.

“Go change yourself, we’re going soon.”

The redhead didn’t protest. Ian looked at himself again. This was a plain suit when you thought about it, a white shirt with black pants and a black jacket, but it was the most elegant thing he ever wore. It made him uneasy though, wearing those clothes which he had bought with Mickey’s money…At this sight, Mickey smiled. “You look good. I didn’t think it would fit you that well.”

“It would fit anyone,” Ian stated while readjusting his collar; Mickey seized his hand gently but firmly, brought it to his face and put a kiss on his fingers. Ian couldn’t help but shiver at this contact. Old Mickey would have never done that, even if old Ian would have given anything for it. He looked at the red-head with a slight grin:

“That’s where you’re wrong. I saw guys dressed in the best way possible, and they still looked like freaking jackass. That’s what I learned working with those guys: you need more than a good suit to impress, but knowing to wear it is always a plus.”

Although Ian wished to make a snarky remark, he found none, because even if Mickey was still speaking like a thug at times, he had class. It was almost infuriating but he couldn’t deny it. First, he was indeed wearing those expensive clothes with good taste and elegance. Second, the way he walked, hold his head, the way he entered a place like he owned it showed that he had indeed learned a lot about presence. He wasn’t that dirty lost boy of the South Side anymore. Mickey was now a man, and he had to admit that he would have found him really seducing if only he didn’t turn that bad. The mobster smiled and kissed him. Ian responded although a part of him wanted to push him away. Kissing him had lost its taste, even though there was something attractive in Mickey. It ended soon enough, though. They got in the car, and Ian couldn’t help but observe Mickey again. Yes, he really had gained something, and it showed how much time had passed since they ‘broke up’.

“Why did you suddenly came back?” Asked Ian after Mickey started the car.

“I saw you the other night, when you were saving some guys with your colleagues. I thought of you a lot during all that time, but seeing you again…I don’t know, I realized I had to find you once more.”

Ian remained silent, he didn’t notice Mickey at all, he would have remembered otherwise. It felt weird, knowing his ex saw him during his job while he had been absolutely unaware of it. Mickey’s voice took him out of his thoughts: “Why did you became an EMT?”

“…Why do you care?”

“Just curious. You wanted to be a soldier before.”

“…Because of what happened to Liam. You probably heard of it.”

“That your dear sister almost killed him with cocaine? Yeah. Pretty surprising.”

He rolled his eyes and wanted to punch Mickey for this, but it was impossible, first because he was still holding his family at gunpoint, second because he was driving. He didn’t even know why he was telling Mickey. Maybe because he was the only one who asked? His family just thought it was a better idea than becoming a soldier. Caleb never asked, he had assumed Ian took this decision after saving that woman from a car on fire. It was partly true, but not entirely.

“I couldn’t do anything but watch when they took him away. That’s maybe at this moment I started to reconsider what I wanted to do. Then there was one time when I saw a car accident. One of the cars started to burn and the woman inside was unconscious. I took the woman out and…I don’t know, it seemed like the best thing to do. I wanted to be there for my family and to help people too.”

It made Mickey feel guilty once more. He remembered when he told Ian he would have to quit his job, he had been unable to understand why Ian reacted so badly. Now he understood, it was obviously very important to him. But things could have been different, if Ian had said ‘yes’, he would have been open to find a better compromise.

“Why did you say ‘no’?”

“What?”

“When I asked you to come back.”

Ian sighed; was it really so hard to understand? “Because I have a life and a boyfriend now; at least I had a life and a boyfriend.”

Remembering Ian dancing with that guy was painful. He felt a burning jealousy once more: “Was he different from me?” Asked he bitterly.

“Yes. We had a sane relationship. Like, you know, we were actually dating.”

“Flowers and chocolate?” More venom filled his voice.

“No, but he wouldn’t hesitate to call me his boyfriend, to touch me in public, to kiss me, to get me on a date and all. We actually kissed and dated before fucking, like normal people. I must admit I kinda needed that.”

His hands gripped the wheel tightly, anger replacing the guilt quickly. It was hard to hear: he couldn’t fulfill Ian’s needs? Well, too bad for him! Anyway it was Ian who was here to fulfill his needs, wasn’t it?

“Hope you had your fun. Anyway, if what you want is a date, then, you’ll have one.”

“What is this dinner about?”

“It’s mostly a friendly dinner, we’ll discuss a few things with co-workers, but you should like it.”

“Shouldn’t you bring your wife?”

Mickey laughed at this. “My wife? I can guarantee you that most of the people at the table won’t bring a legitimate spouse. Or maybe Alphonso, he is really fond of his wife. I’m bringing guys since a long time and they don’t bat an eye. Most of them times, there are girlfriends and boyfriends, a lot of escorts, but not many spouses. I did brought Svet at times, but she isn’t that fond of it.”

Mickey was telling truth, Ian realized it soon. When they met Mickey’s ‘colleagues’, none of them seemed surprised to see him. There were eight mobsters in total, five men and three women all going with someone, plus Mickey and he. Their table was the biggest of the restaurant. He had to admit that he rarely stepped into places like that. Ned brought him to fancy hotels, but they would mostly stay in the room. Caleb brought him to a nice restaurant as well, but it was nowhere like this one.

Only people dressed up in fancy clothes, in a modern style mixed with some mahogany furniture, candles at the table, waiters and waitresses dressed in suits, and a man playing piano near the bar…And yet he was pretty aware that under the elegance, most of the people here were nothing but trash. He looked at Mickey who was speaking with a guy, it was so strange to see him here, he was still speaking a bit like a thug but Lord…He was wearing a chic suite, in that restaurant, like a high-class businessman. He had to admit he was attractive, he couldn’t deny that, if only things had been different…

“And who is your charming friend?” Asked one woman.

“This is Ian, an old friend I reunited with.”

Ian shook the woman’s hand gently. “Pleased to meet you.”

“So am I.”

Ian was sitting face to face with a young woman hardly older than him and who seemed a bit brainless. She told him she was a professional, as for the guy at his left side, he was the boyfriend of a mobster woman. In fact, just as Mickey predicted, the man named Alphonso brought his wife and he was the only one. Iris, her name was; she was beautiful indeed, with dark hair and blue eyes, even if he wasn’t attracted to women he could see their beauty.

He could also see that the mobster was in love with his spouse and he felt envious. He wished he was that well right now. He was no fool: Mickey also wanted to punish him, he knew him too well to ignore that.

They were mostly discussing business and Ian found himself talking with the escort facing him. Melissa was her name, and he found out she wasn’t as brainless as she appeared first. She wasn’t a smartass, sure, but she had enough conversation to entertain him a bit, more than the twink at his side who hardly spoke one word. Mickey wouldn’t speak much to him either; he seemed to ignore him for now. He would only talk to one of his associates. Ian guessed it was maybe a way to humiliate him, let him feel that even if he wouldn’t say it, he was indeed some kind of a little prize. He felt a hand on his knee and saw Mickey rubbing it. He wasn’t looking at him or speaking to him, though, he continued to talk to another guy. The redhead contained the urge to roll his eyes and sighed. Suddenly, he felt Mickey leaning toward him and speaking softly but with a hint of mischief:

“So, how do you like that place?”

“It’s a fine restaurant. I would have never imagined seeing you in such a place.”

“Nor that I would be the one to bring you here. But then now, I guess you had a lot of sugar daddy or shit like that to get you that kind of things.”

This made Ian angry: did Mickey think he was some whore?

“So you see yourself as my sugar daddy? Pretty fitting indeed.”

He saw Mickey’ eyes darken at this and they stopped talking. Their dishes were served, Ian feigned to ignore Mickey’s attention. Instead, he listened to Melissa making a comment on how Italian cooking was one of her favorite, and that since one client took her for a few days in Italia.

“My knowledge of Italian food is limited to pasta and pizza, really the basic.”

“Good, it means you have much to discover,” she answered cheerfully.

Mickey’s fingers went up his tight and he breathed in hard. This was really making him uncomfortable. He took Mickey’s hand in his to stop him in his tracks and put it away firmly. This seemed to amuse Mickey, he didn’t insist further, at least not for now; he needed to use both hands to eat anyway.

“How did the two of you met? I would have remembered such red hair,” someone asked.

“We’re from the same neighborhood,” Mickey summed up simply.

“We didn’t see each other for two years, and our reunion was really unexpected,” Ian added, letting Mickey know what he meant.

“That’s what happened with Alphonso and I,” Iris said, “we were friends in our youth and we accidentally met again some years ago.”

Her husband smiled and kissed her hand gently. Mickey put his hand back on Ian’s tight and gave it a squeeze. His look showed he didn’t like that comment. Out of defiance, Ian wanted to tell more, but he realized it wasn’t a good idea to speak too much about his private life with mobsters. The less they knew about him, the better.

He felt Mickey’s breath near his ear again: “There will be other unexpected things, I can promise that.”

“Is that a threat?” Ian whispered for them only to hear.

Mickey frowned at the question but didn’t answer anything. The conversation went on, it was really a friendly dinner, though a few business comments were exchanged, there was also a lot of jokes and little gossips exchanged. Ian’s captor continued to speak mostly with his partners, though he would touch him very often, stroking his arm, his knee, thigh and hip. The guy who took Melissa here was behaving quite in the same way with her. That was maybe another reason Ian spoke to her through a good part of the evening. Later on, as they were finished eating, Melissa went to stand near the piano to listen to it a bit. Ian went at her side, happy to have a little space, not noticing Mickey’s eyes on him. The escort smiled to him as he stood by her side.

“You’re okay, honey?”

“Yeah, I was just…I was wondering, how do you do that job? I mean, don’t they repulse you?”

“Some clients aren’t my type at all, but some are good-looking or are nice to hang around with. In the end, I don’t think too much and simply give the client what they want. They might repulses me at times, but when you’re in my position, why show it? I don’t show my feelings, I give them what they want to see or hear, and I have what I want as well.”

“Sound simple.”

“Not always. Like tonight, he hardly speaks to me, I must say it’s a relief to have you here.”

“Okay…”

“You think of becoming an escort yourself?”

“God, no!”

“Too bad, I’m pretty sure you would succeed.”

He huffed in disbelief and amusement, but realized he was kinda doing her job already; the difference was, he just had one client. He wished he was still doing his job as an EMT. He wished he was going home to Debbie already. He had to call her again. He took out his cell phone, excused himself to Melissa and went to the windows in a corner where he could be left in peace.

“Hey Debs.”

“Hey, Ian! Are you alright? I wanted to call you today, but I never know when it’s the right time.”

“I’m alright, I’m more worried about you.”

“You don’t have to, believe me, Fiona and I are fine.”

“You sure? No one threatened or messed with you?”

“No, not at all…Look, I know you won’t like it, but we told Lip and Carl, though, they had to know.”

“Yeah, they called me already. What are you doing right now?”

“I was just doing my homework. I don’t feel like going out much anyway.”

He heard Carl’s distant voice Is this Ian? Then he heard his brother speak instead of his little sister: “Hey, you’re still okay?”

“Still kicking, don’t worry.”

“I wish you could kick Mickey’s ass.”

“So do I,” he murmured with a little grin. “No one bothered you either?”

“No, I’m fine. Actually, it’s strange, the guy I used to work for doesn’t try to push me to do jobs anymore, he simply told me not to approach him again.”

“Good.”

Carl knew how that kind of things worked well enough: “Did you do something about it?”

“Mickey did it, I didn’t have to ask. It was a proof of his good will, or some shit like that. So I would know he meant it when he said he would help.”

“I didn’t want his help! Not at that price.”

“I know, but he did it anyway. So just stay away from troubles, that’s the best thing you can do for me.”

“Yeah, no problem.”

“Really, Carl, promise me you won’t screw up.”

“I’ll be good…If that can reassure you, there is a girl I like. She says she prefers me when I’m not acting like a thug. I thought girls liked bad guys.”

“Bad guys are only exciting for a short time, trust my experience.”

“Ian? The fuck are you doing?”

He saw Mickey coming toward him. He sighed and spoke one last time: “I gotta go. Say good evening to Fiona for me and to Lip if he is around.”

Carl just told him goodbye before he hung up. Mickey seemed annoyed. “What?”

“Are you really gonna give long sentimental call to your family every night?”

“I stayed on phone hardly five minutes. And even if I did, why would you care?”

“You’re here for me, remember that.”

“I’m here to protect my family.”

He went to go back to the table but Mickey grabbed his arm. “Don’t start to be snappy.”

“I’ll stay with you as you demanded, but don’t expect me to be your little bitch.”

This time he allowed Ian to go and sit back. Once they were back at the table, Mickey continued with his touch. Their travel back was mostly silent, until Mickey spoke:

“What was that thing with that bimbo slut? You spoke with her most of the evening.”

“So what?”

“Why was she so interesting?”

“Because she had more brains than some trophies who got dragged along and she wasn’t a mobster. And she was sitting right in front of me. Why do you care?”

“You could surprise me once more.”

“Seriously? I’m gay; I never denied that, unlike you.”

It was foolish to be jealous, yet Mickey couldn’t help it. Ian had enjoyed her company, even if it was in a friendly way; he had obviously spent a good time with her…while he was repulsed to stay with him. He was disappointed too, he had wished to hurt Ian a bit by ignoring him, he wanted to make the redhead eager for his attention, but instead he just turned to someone else. Once at home, Mickey went to take a look at his son who was sleeping soundly. He didn’t touch him or anything; he didn’t want to wake him up. Instead he went back to their room. Ian was under the shower, and Mickey wanted to join him, but he figured out it would be hard for both of them if there was no sex involved. So he went to the other bathroom, and was satisfied to see his redhead waiting for him when he came in. He was checking on his phone more exactly.

“What is it this time?”

“None of your business.”

Mickey advanced toward him in a way which was enough to tell he wouldn’t drop it. Yet Ian was hard-headed as well and didn’t say anything. A bit annoyed, Mickey took the phone out of Ian’s hands and put it away in spite of his prisoner’s protest. It was a text from Lip, asking how he was doing. Ian took the phone back from him.

“If there was nothing secret, why would you mind?”

“Ever heard of something called privacy?”

“You could have told me that it was a text from your brother and that was all. Put that fucking phone down.”

The redhead rolled his eyes and did as he was told for once. He didn’t want this to go on and on for hours.

“Good…I must say it was good having you in the restaurant.”

“If all you needed was to touch someone’s leg, you could have brought someone else.”

“Told you: someone else won’t do. Did you feel neglected? We can correct that.”

He pushed Ian down on the bed and lie over him, pinning him under his body. He started to kiss him once more and ran his hands under his tee-shirt. He could feel the red-head was tense, and a part of Mickey liked to feel him like this, to feel Ian was having no choice after all the rejection he went through. He also needed to unleash, he enjoyed himself tonight but there was still something that frustrated him. He started to get rougher in the way he kissed him and grabbed him. Ian felt one of Mickey’s hands unbuttoning his shirt slowly and he couldn’t help but tense. Mickey’s hands started to open his white shirt and Ian perfectly knew what he was going to do.

Mickey was suddenly pushed away and he retaliated by pinning Ian’s wrist down. He liked it rough! The redhead turned his head to the side when he tried to kiss him, so instead Mickey attacked his neck again. He kissed it at first and then bit into it almost hungrily. Ian winced in pain, and arched his back under Mickey. It took all his self-control not to struggle and hit the man. Instead he hissed: “What do you want, Mickey? Hurt me?”

The teeth released his neck and Ian sighed in relief.

“I would rather fuck you right now, I wasn’t used to be on top with you, but I got pretty fond of it with other guys. We can make it rough if you want.”

He continued to kiss his neck hungrily, Ian arched his body against his once more, trying to reverse their position but Mickey held on, tightening his grip on his wrists. Nuzzling his face, he licked Ian’s cheek and murmured in his ear: “Seems like you want to be on top.”

“I want nothing! Stop being a fucking pussy, if you want to hurt me, spell it out!”

Mickey backed away slightly, still on top of his captive and looked at him right in the eyes: “Damn right I want to hurt you. You made me suffer more than you imagine, Gallagher!”

“For once you’re honest! Maybe you should have done that in the past! In the end you dug up your own grave, don’t put the blame on me!”

Still holding his wrists down, the mobster didn’t know if he wanted to kiss him, hit him or ask for forgiveness. Ian went on: “You already hurt me, if that can make you happy. I lost my boyfriend, I lost my job, I lost my freedom, I lost the life I planned…I won’t live with my niece and sister as I hoped. Look at me right now, Mickey, if you can’t see that I’m suffering, then you’re a fucking dumbass!”

He didn’t answer anything. It hurt to hear that, and yet wasn’t it what he wanted? “I hope this makes you happy,” muttered Ian.

All of sudden, Mickey released his wrists and stormed out of the room. If he had been more careful, he might have noticed Svetlana standing beside the door. The woman had backed away from it just in time not to get hit when he opened. She was relieved that he didn’t see her; she would have a hard time explaining to him she was actually listening to their conversation. She waited for her husband to be far enough and entered the room. Ian was surprised to see her; she sat on the bed.

“I think we need to talk.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was pretty intense, I guess! Hope you liked it, don't hesitate to comment!

**Author's Note:**

> Don't hesitate to tell me what you think! Don't hesitate to point out Grammar mistakes; English isn't my first langage.


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